how's it going?

Well that was a fairly trying shift. One of the long ones, with my coworker leaving 2 hrs in, due to the flu. But being on my own kept me busy and I had no room for sulking and feeling all lost and overwhelmed with life. So in the end it gave me a bit of a break!

Looking for a new place to call home. Working on landing a pretty nice (but tiny) apt this weekend. Lets hope it work s out :)

Its about the third time a customer at work asks if it is my boutique. Do I look like a young owner? That's pretty rad. I should just start answering "Yes" to people.

I haven't got much more news I'm afraid. I lead a mundayne-leaning-on-boring life presentement.

Had breakfast last Friday with the peeps from work. Those lovely ladies. French toast and fruit, can't go wrong with that. Perhapsies one day morning, I will make french toast for you. Why you would be over at such a time is at your discretion, and we can discuss the matter later if you would like.

The apartment has an Island counter. pretty nice pretty nice (don't get your hopes up, don't get your hopes up Avril)

목요일

Overall today was a pretty okay day. Gots another Meagan day tomorrow, coolz!

I've been feeling a little off lately, like my brain tries to take short breaks from functioning at normal speed, or my stomatch ties in knots.. But I can't seem to link it to any particularly stressful things going on. I just feel, I don't know, nervous? Gotta kick that out of the way!

And thus, taking form are the plans for this weekend's mini-escape (also as I have told myself I need to satiate this need to run away, without actually packing up and running away (like the last time..) ).

Oh right, there was something else..

We Have Got A CAT!! :D

Not-So-great-things come in pairs

I shouldn't say pairs, as there are a whole buncha little things. Good and bad.

Good news; The money I thought was missing from the end of day cash, was actually there all along. Bad news; I had recounted about 3 times, calculated things over, for a good half hour, and still thought there was cash missing. My brain isn't what it used to be.

Bad news; I've lost my Mp3 player. I didn't even have it for all that long, but I do miss it terribly. Ive grown accustom to having it by my side, chillin' in my ear playing or not. And running ain't the same without it. I can now hear myself, breathing and what not. It's weird. Also running related,

Bad news: My left Hamstring. What are you doing?! My knee is all better but now you? *sigh*

The first part of work shift today went speedy, as time seems to advance rapidly when one is in good company. Can't say the same about the last 2 hrs on my lonesome. I just sat there and drooled over This. Which finally brings me to,

Bad news; I have found a jar of Nutella.
I am so screwed you have no idea. The spoon has already dived in. And self control seems to be eagerly trying to make an escape out the door.

So I have kindof decided not to think for a bit. The whole "What to do with your future", "What your next move" & "Here, why bother enjoying your summer when you can fret upon things that may or may not happen a whole bunch of months away from now".

But I do think about these things all the time. T'will be a challenge. I'll try a month. Obviously it will cross my mind, and I will surely at times catch myself thinking about finding a place to stay after September, or at what point I can afford to run away across the ocean, but I will make an effort to not dwell on all that stuff. At least not excessively. Its not healthy for me.

That's it for now.

And if you tend to ask me these questions, I'd appreciate the break :)

Applesauce making tomorrow. yesss.

Better pictures of the "flash flood"

Some better pictures depicting all the water on Tuesday. The store is pretty much at the bottom of a big slope. The accumulated water rose up, up, and up over the sidewalk by over half a foot, i'd say.

Soggy card board boxes didn't do much to block the water pouring in from under the door and the sides. Felt like a titanic scene (on a much much smaller scale).

Check the water level outside on this one ^ . whoa.
I'm aware this is nothing in comparison to what people face everyday all over the world. This is not a common sight in our city. Hence the "holy moly" my franco-coworker kept uttering.

And after the damage was assesed (one pair of pants and slippers didn't make it :C ), the remaining water was vacumed and mopped up. Most of it irrigated down into the basement. I don't want to go check on that anytime soon.

On the positive side, our floor never looked cleaner, and my flowers got all the water they could ask for!!

photos courtesy of Anna Maruska

Thats done...until next year.

Glad that day is over. I really don't like my birthday.
Which seems silly.

Wasn't always the case. I looved birthday parties when I was young. Always wore the fun dresses, streamers in the house, home made oreo or strawberry short cake in the shape of an animal or thematic. And now when it is anyone else's birthday I am ecstatic! So, much, fun.

Maybe it is due to a mix of conflicting feelings about growing older, and partly the (to me) misguided attention received. I mean why celebrate and congratulate on such a day, I didn't accomplish anything special or worthy of a fiesta. Maybe credit to my mom who gave birth, but other then that, seems uneventful. And it happened 22years ago people! move on.

But of course my warped sense of things only applies to me, as anyone else who's birthday comes around, I jump on the bandwagon and bring out the balloons, without the slightest critical or unjustifiable analyzed thought.

Automated-response [✔]

I have to change these habits.
When I sit down (actually walking home at 11:48pm)and think about it, Ca me nuit.


Without realizing it, I have conditioned myself to a few responses when asked a few questions. The Question- then *bam* my automated answer. Its gotten to the point where I don't even take notice, or really think about the questions anymore. Maybe today I feel more like "yes" then a "no", but that doesn't even pass through my mind before I reply.

Sometimes situations arise, and there is an open __ of a few seconds, instant spontaneous reaction to be had. Instead its more of a stop and the pre-regulated thought/reaction/response/what-have-you kicks in. Sometimes I am given a few minutes to react, but it still reaches the same conclusion.

Like saliva to a steak. I have to revers things in my brain, and change the way I approach these situations. Which I want to do, and have thought about, but the second it actually come into play, I'm Pavlov's Dog again.

Need to rewire things.

blehr

At times like these, I'm glad I don't have predispositions of reckless drinking or anything self destructive to fall back on.




other than my thoughts perhaps